New Zealand Prime Minister John Key was …

alienNew Zealand Prime Minister John Key was recently asked to provide “any evidence to disprove the theory that [he] is in fact a David Icke style shapeshifting reptilian alien ushering humanity towards enslavement.” Key, in a congenial manner atypical of shapeshifting reptilian aliens, responded: “To the best of my knowledge, no. I’ve taken the unusual step of not only seeing a doctor but a vet, and both have confirmed I’m not a reptile … I’ve never been in a spaceship, never been in outer space, and my tongue’s not overly long either.

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